So I thought I would take the time to share some advice I learned from a dear friends of mine -
If you are ever in a situation where someone asks you for advice because they are down or hurt or angry look them dead in he eye and without missing a beat ask them:
5. Dracula: Dead and Lovin It -
Dr. Steward (Harvey Korman): Would an enema help?
There can be two outcomes in the scenario they hate you forever and never ask you a question again ( bonus you didn't have to answer the question) or its cuts the tension and gives you a second t0 formulate an answer!
____________________________________________________________________
Next time your friend pisses you off or does something completely stupid you will then be able to say:
4. Smokey and the Bandit -
Buford T. Justice (Jackie Gleason): [to his son] There's no way, *no* way that you came from *my* loins. Soon as I get home, first thing I'm gonna do is punch yo mamma in da mouth!
This is a two part insult first you are calling them stupid then you are implying you slept with their mother, from experience its never good to make a comment about sleeping with someones mother.
____________________________________________________________________
Whenever you are in a place that you are uncomfortable, old folks home, day cares, mega churches, you know places with weird people -
3. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade -
Professor Henry Jones (Sean Connery): [to Indiana, while watching a Nazi parade and book burning]
My son, we're pilgrims in an unholy land.
____________________________________________________________________
This one is great for someone you don't know has really pissed you off and is about to find out why its better to run and hide than to stand and fight-
2. Batman -
The Joker (Jack Nicholson): Tell me something, my friend. You ever danced with the devil by the pale moonlight
This works particularly well when you are standing in the dark and the other persons realizes who said it.
____________________________________________________________________
This saying is usable during any situation in life that is a good thing, you win in poker, get the girl, get a promotion, or anything in general.
1. History of the World Part 1
LOUIS XVI (Mel Brooks): "It's good to be the king!"
You may use that at will or make your own list but remember use them wisely if you don't then they can be overused and well we all know what happens there!
Phobia of the day: Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words.
( I don't know if this is real but it made me laugh)
Number of the day: 2-1/2
Animal of the Day: Pine Marten (Martes martes)
No comments:
Post a Comment